I was becoming aware that every sign compounded the one before and yet the true significance of each only became transparently clear following my final decision.
How many signs do we miss (or ignore) when we’re trying to be polite and do the ‘right thing’?
- Two phone conversations with employees of the firm where I’d felt ‘this isn’t the right place for me’
(Hint 1: Mentioned to friends, but ignored as the firm had been recommended)
- Experiencing the sound, and sight, of the steel gate closing with metallic force behind my car as I entered the private car-park
(Hint 2: Was I now ‘locked in?)
- Following the ‘car rally-like’ instructions in order to negotiate the rabbit warren route from the car-park to the office
(Hint 3: Making it as difficult as it can for me to get there?)
- Meeting the woman (who was leaving) who asked, with tremulous voice, “How do I get out of here?”
- (Hint 4: Listen to her words)
- Feeling the ‘band’ that appeared physically solid and proceeded to progressively tighten around my chest to the extent I could hardly breathe the closer I got to the meeting
- (Hint 5: Can’t breathe = can’t exist)
- Filling out the form with the wording designed to make a person feel that past and current decisions were totally inadequate (I sense they may make small alterations to their form after my deletions of several words) Ooops – but what fun I had!
(Hint 6: Words have power!)
- Being kept waiting for 20 minutes after the appointed time having been specifically asked to arrive half an hour earlier than the original appointment time
(Hint 7: Still giving me time to make my mind up?)
- My fb post written while waiting which asked, “Ever been sitting in a waiting room and you KNOW you’re in the wrong place? Do I stay or do I go? Argh!!!”
(Hint 8: Ignoring your gut instinct and needing confirmation from outside)
- My timely ‘angel’, Elle, who immediately posted, “Leave!” …. I left…politely!
(Hint 9: Having the courage to listen)
- I was instantly able to breathe again as the ‘steel band’ fell away
- I felt like a fly rescued from a spider web and I admit to a certain amount of ‘release of tension’ upon reaching my car
- What a relief when the gate opened as I approached it and I was able to emerge into the sunlight once again
- Woo Hoo… Self-empowerment rules! BUT – don’t take so long next time!!